Joy Monahan, Surfer

Who more fitting to start off my interview series but Joy Monahan?  This World Champion Longboarder has recently become a mother and loving it.  I caught up with this natural beauty for a little playdate and an interview. Through her surfing, she has seen the world, enjoying a long successful surfing career which put her smile on the map.  However. she explains the thrill of motherhood as nothing she has experienced before, and "the ultimate."

 The first thing you will notice about Joy when you meet her is that she is incredibly humble...the way she hugs you makes you instantly trust her and her smile...well her smile is a novel on its own.  Everything about watching her and Jackson makes you want to scream in a pillow.  Jackson, is just so cute, uttering little words, showing off his tricks and running around a thousand miles per minute.  Joy on the other hand, has this understated elegance...a glow which made me wonder if it was  from the 45 minute surf she had before I got there or just something she never got rid of after pregnancy ..Either way she wears it all too well.

Here is what Joy had to say about motherhood, tips on a successful marriage, a creative drive she now possesses, and of course,  surfing.  At the very bottom are some photos Joy shared from her personal album.

How do you find raising Jackson in Hawaii, and is there anywhere else in the world you would raise him? 

I love being able to raise Jackson in Hawaii. The ocean is such a huge part of my life and to be able to share that with Jackson is really awesome.  Drew and I have been to Australia and we do love that country. We would joke that if we didn't live in America then we would definitely live down under, but we are pretty happy with where we are at right now.

How has motherhood inspired you?  Has it changed you?

Its funny, but I feel like I've gotten more creative since being a mother, probably because I've gotten cheaper too since I'd rather make things, than buy them. But, I really have enjoyed getting into sewing. I'm still a beginner but have made some simple bow ties and a blanket for Jackson and some of his friends. I also made Jackson's Halloween costumes for the last two years which has been really fun.

Jackson is a lot like Phe.  Typical boys going a thousand miles per minute.  Do you ever feel like your going crazy?  What do you do in those circumstances. 

Yes I definitely have some crazy moments since 'Action Jackson' never stops, but he really is a lot of fun and I try to enjoy those moments.  When things do get tough, though, I just have to remind myself that he is just a one year old so I try to extend my patience with him and not get so worked up by the situation. It also helps to be around family as often as I can so that there are more people to watch 'Action Jackson".

You come from a big family, and your sisters all now have children too, can you tell us what a typical Thanksgiving at your house is like? 

My husband would probably say chaotic and I'd probably say fun. When my whole family gets together there is usually at least three people trying to talk at once, which is totally normal to me, and when you throw in eight grandkids running around it gets pretty hectic.  We try our best to all get together at least once during the year and I really treasure those times. 

What lessons do you feel like your parents taught you that you will want to pass down to Jackson?

Now that I am a mother I've realized how much I took for granted growing up and how selfless my parents were and still are.  My parents instilled in me the importance of getting a higher education. They also taught me the importance of setting goals and working hard to achieve them. Most importantly they have shown me unconditional love and support in whatever my endeavors were.  I hope that Drew and I can teach Jackson those same things I've learned from my parents. 

Has the dynamic between you and your husband, Drew, changed now that you have Jackson?  Any tips you can give us on a happy marriage?

I think our marriage has gotten stronger and there is deeper love in our marriage that centers around Jackson. It really is crazy how your capacity to love increases when you become a mother. I think the best thing you can do for your child is to have a healthy, loving relationship with your partner.  Your child will learn so much--how to love, how to effectively communicate, how to be kind, and will also feel stability.  Its so amazing how much your child picks up just from your example (whether you are being a good example or a bad example).  As far as tips, since we live with my in-laws we are around family all the time so, every now and then Drew and I will take Jackson and just the three of us will hang out going to the park or beach or whatever. Also we try to escape and have a date night with just the two of us when we can, which works out great since we are living with Jackson's babysitters ;)

Where is a special place on the island you like taking Jackson to?

We like taking Jackson to the beach since he is a water baby. There is not a special place we go, but we like to keep it mellow so we like Kaimana's or Baby Makapu'u or even Pillers down the street from us. 

And last but not least, I understand Jackson comes first before anything, but when can we expect you to be back in the water competing?  Where does Surfing sit with you?  Is there anything else you have been passionate about lately?

I started competing again this past summer and did just a few contests.  It felt good to be out pushing myself again and I met some new talented surfers coming up in the ranks which was fun.  I realized how lucky I am when I get a chance to get out in the ocean, even if its for a quick 45 minute session. I also realized I can't be picky about waves or conditions since I just need to be grateful that someone (usually my grandma or mother-in-law) is able to help watch Jackson so I can get my ocean therapy in.  I think my drive for competing has subsided a little since becoming a mom, but I do enjoy some competition every now and then. :) I love surfing and can't wait for the day when Jackson and I can paddle out for a session together.

Oops I lied, there's one more question-- any plans to expand your family anytime soon?  Do you see yourself having a big family too?

We do hope to have more kids and we both come from a family of four, so we've always said four is a good number. But, I know things can change once you start having more so I guess we'll just wait and see. :)

What is Motherhood to You?

I have decided to take a spin on my blog and feature and interview different, inspiring mothers.  Motherhood is a bond, a feeling you can never replace with anything else and almost impossible to describe to someone unless you are one yourself.   What is motherhood to me? In a short version, it's an empowerment that brings an even more profound depth to life, an inner value for myself, an immense respect for the human body, mother nature, and my own parents. The trials and tribulation the sacrifices, the sudden change that 9 months can never quite prepare you for .  My body has a completely different function now..my eyes are there to watch my childs every move, legs for running after him,  and nipples are (fun) toys.   I know you will agree, you are not living for yourself anymore.  From that initial moment when milk fills your breasts, to the butterflies in your stomach when you spot your child's face in the crowd, to the elation of when you found out mom jeans were making a come back--Life has never been so good.


So I've said my part, now it's time to give other moms who never gave up, who've also been empowered by motherhood while juggling their passion, a VOICE.  Regardless of a mother's nationality or beliefs, single or married, working or taking a break, I know we can all learn from each other.  There always seems to be this underlining significant respect and sleepless bond with us mothers, through our commonality--I hope you enjoy exploring this with me. Welcome to Phe and Me.


I am so incredibly lucky to have my husband support me on this path and come along to photograph and capture the essence between the mother and the child.  I could not have made this happen without you.

Disney Aulani Resort

Last week we took a little family staycation trip to the Disney Aulani Resort.  Definitely better than expected and no shortage of fun there. I have recently just come to accept that the multi billion dollar Disney corporation is not going anywhere and that whether I like it or not, it is embedded in my child's brain, and most importantly-- IT MAKES HIM DAMN HAPPY!  So therefore, it is part of my life whether I like it or not and I have to get used to the ten dollar burnt hot dogs and the 45 minute wait to get a picture with Minnie.  But a picture is worth a lifetime! Shut up.

My sister always saids, "God! you can be such a pessimist!"  And yes she's right, maybe a little more today than ever but why am I taking it out on Disney?  Then why even do a post today?  Phe is taking an extra long nap.. Is it that I'm on anti bio tics and I can't have a glass of wine later on this evening?  Or could it be this crappy weather that keeps persisting or am I just really scared that the world is going to end?  Where should I spend my last 2 days on Earth with the  loves of my life?  Well, Phoenix would say the Disney Aulani Resort.

And I promise this will be positive from now if you haven't stopped reading already.  Disney Aulani is really really FUN!  I'm not being sarcastic either. It's basically Disney Land with out the rides, but the lazy river, two water slides (and one that's actually really tormenting) infinity jacuzzi, built in snorkeling cave, menehune water play area, and last but not least little to NO wait to get a photo with the characters TOTALLY make up for it.  Not sure what they were trying to achieve with their decor, but it's pretty dull. You would never know you are even in a Disney property if you didn't accidentally run into Goofy waist high in the pool .  We were also there on a Monday night, lucky enough to get to see the Starlit Hui which is like a luau without the food, but there is a tiki bar at least.  At the end of the show, the characters come out to put on a show and dance with you.  There's a lot of interaction and it's not very crowded so the children all get great seats unlike, a big auditorium at Disney land.

To wrap this up..I came up with a couple tips for your stay when booking Aulani.

1. Make sure you are there on the right nights. There are a lot of activities going on and if you are flexible, you want to be there for the Starlit Hui or the Pool Party.  The daily activity list can be found here on their website

2. The resort's direct number is extremely hard to find.  I found it while I was there.  Here it is.  Take it down don't lose it, save it to your sim card.  Disney Aulani Resort DIRECT NUMBER: 808-674-6200

3.  Don't go down the dark one person water slide.  It's a black hole, your worst nightmare and it gave us anxiety for a week straight.

*some resort images taken from yelp.

Moanalua Gardens Picnic

Moanalua Gardens is known for two things. Big tree, biggest tree ever aka the Hitachi Tree and home to one of King Kamehameha's properties. Im fact, his cottage that was built in 1850's is still present there. With that said, you cannot help but walk a little bit taller here whether you are a Japanese tourist stopping by merely to get a photo with the famous "Hitachi Tree" or you are a local seeking relaxation, or a little spiritual enlightenment with a basket full of goodies..

 Let me explain...The Hitachi Tree is one particular monkeypod tree, the biggest one out of all of them, that's been making a whopping $400,000 a year since the 70's being trademarked as the Electronics company's success symbol. Apparently, the park was going to be closed down and destroyed, until Hitachi made the offer, so thank Hitachi, a little Hawaiian history preserved, and the island's biggest tree still lives. Since I grew up in Japan I am quite familiar and fond of the Hitachi Tree commercials and branding, playing in between my favorite shows. It was definitely a little nostalgic to be so close to it let alone get to touch it. The tree is reportedly 130 years old and boasts a spirit of wisdom and success. From the moment you step into the gardens, you can't help the force that draws you into the tree.

 If you do not know this background, you might be a little overwhelmed with the amount of tour buses stopping by every 15 minutes. Regardless, it's such a beautiful and serene spot..perfect for naps, studying for finals, and picnicking while letting your little ones run free. I saw some people with fishing poles, so I am guessing there's a little river stream that you can fish at as well.

 Just 15 minutes away from Waikiki and extremely easy to get too, this is one of the Hawaii's best kept secret, unless of course you happen to be on a Japanese tour bus. Here is the link to the Hitachi Commercial I grew up watching..

Keiki Swap Meet/ Children's Discovery Center

Hello, we are back we are back! A new project I am working on is inspiring me more than EVER to blog Phe and Me, and going to the Keiki Swap meet this weekend was just the perfect re-beginning. Phe is now definitely a toddler and not a baby =( Scrolling through old posts made me teary just thinking about how FAST children grow. However, I have to say, instead of waking up 2 times a night now I get a full nights sleep, I'm no longer cleaning out his mouth with soap in order to get germs out but just DIRTY WORDS, and no longer wondering if his bold head will ever have a party, now it's raging blonde. Oh how quickly the melodious "maaa maaa gooo goo gaaah gaahs" turned into a cacophony of "NO's! Chocolaaaate, and Yo Gabba Gabba Now!" I do miss the days where my husband and I could go to a nice dinner and he would just suck on his feet, now he eats a full course meal and doesn't forget to tip either. All in all, EVERY moment has been such an unforgettable memory that gets replaced with an even more special milestone and we are NEVER short of laughs. One thing gets easier and another gets harder..I guess that's life with a child and life in general, and before you know he will have his license and never come home.

 Well atleast until then I have made a promise to enjoy every moment being a kid with my lil kid who is no longer a baby and can do fun things like shop at Keiki Swap meets and go to the Discovery Center! We all had so much fun this weekend...but it's not all fun, it's economical as well. Keiki Swap Meet at Kakaako was organized by some genius at the Discovery Center who decided to teach kids an early lesson in entrepreneurship and economy. Why not throw a swap meet with kids leftovers with kids vending their stores? Of course their parents help, but what a great way to come up with extra coin for Christmas and a lesson in monetary value not to mention getting a glimpse of the grim reality which is depreciating assests... I heard kids say "But my converse were $20!!!" Sorry sweetheart, they're $5 after you wear them for 2 years..Ironically a priceless lesson learned...pun intended. Not to rub salt in this kids wound but you can also show up very late to the Swap Meet and score 3 pairs of converse for $4 like Phe and I did. Amazing bargains and great vibes. We loved EVERY moment of being there. Other bargains included, drum set for $2, table chair pinic set for a $1, brand new toy story coloring set for $3 and Prince of Bel-Air DVD all Season set for $2.

 Then the real fun started when we entered the Discovery Center right next door to Kakaako Park..This place was like getting spit into a dream that have dreams upon and above dreams.  Literally like being in a Dallas Clayton book.  Kids are invited to be anything they want and can even produce their own theater show with lights and costumes. Bus Driver, Waiters, Firefighters, Bank Tellers, and Car Mechanics, and pretty much all the friendly faces of profession that make up the community can be you for the day. There are 3 levels of fun, and the top floor consists of little tiny villages from different countries. There's a rainforest exhibition and dinosaur ones too. Discovery Center also hosts parties and has a cute little affordable cafe for when your little one gets hungry. Don't snooze or you lose though, as their hours are 9am-1pm Tues through Fri and 10am-3pm weekends and closed Mondays.